Love: The Utter Folly of It (A short play based on 6FU episodes A Place of Anger and Back to the Garden)

Characters

Her: A woman 

Him: A man

Her and Him talk on the phone.

HER: Hey, do you believe in soul mates? It's a Six Feet Under thing. I'm thinking about writing about soul mates. Rabbi Ari is discussing soul mates with Nate.

HIM: I used to believe in that stuff, but as I get older, I don't. I think it's what young, idealistic lovers tell one another--

HER: --I'm watching the episode where the guy accidentally chokes while masturbating--

HIM: --Well... here's what I mean--

HER: --Then, what do you believe in--

HIM: I hear men/women use the excuse "I think it's meant to be" whenever there's a hiccup or break-up in a relationship. Using the "meant to be" argument or "she's my soul mate" argument just sounds to me the same way Christianity would sound to you. Does that make sense? I would've argued that my ex was my Soul Mate years ago, and nothing you can tell me would change it. But I know that's not the case. At all. But, our friendship was deep, but sex ruined it, unfortunately. Or, something. Who knows, really?

HER: I'm not sure, but I think I get what you are saying.

HIM: It's a fairy tale. That's all.

HER: I think that's the problem. I believe in soul mates, but I don't believe in it as a romantic notion.

HIM: Women were raised to believe in fairy tales. And men, who have been emasculated over the past 20 years, are now using--and believing--the same verbiage. And the fact is, ANY relationship needs work. Fairy tales don't exist. 

HER: Yes, but only certain relationships encourage the people to grow as individuals.

HIM: I would hope that people grow as an individual whether they were in a relationship or not. Which sounds oxymoronic. 

HER: Some people do not grow as people in relationships. And, some relationships do not encourage growth.

HIM: Unfortunately, a lot of people don't. And, when those people who don’t want to change and grow meet each other that's where the "Soul Mate" argument falls apart. To a degree.

HER: I think people think all growth feels good. Some growth is painful.

HIM: Yeah. It is. Growth can be moving on from a relationship--friend or lover--or the loss of a loved one. That can be extremely painful.

HER: I do believe there are people who are just karmically in tune, but there is a choice to the mate factor. The problem is when part of it doesn't work out.

HIM: Correct.

HER: It's a lot of alchemy.

HIM: And common sense. And communication.

HER: Yes, but even deeper.

HIM: True, but I think you have to have those things for it to GO deeper--

HER: --I think there is great potential for love that is blinded by biology and physical attraction--

HIM: --In my experience, that is. But, you have to have physical attraction for love to be taken to the next level. Perhaps you're speaking more on a friend/confidante level, but I'm meaning romance. Which is where I believe the fairy tale has ruined a lot of it. And the more general term of "Soul Mate."

HER: No, I'm speaking beyond friendship, but not of romantic love. I believe that is where the mistakes are made. There is something else. And, it has nothing to do with romance.

HIM: I get it, but the term Soul Mate is generally thought of--by the Hoi Polloi--in romantic terms.

HER: It has to do with longevity.

HIM: Perhaps this is what you blog about? This is a good discussion that you could post.

HER: I think that is where I'm going to go...yes.

HIM: You should.

HER: That's why I asked...

HIM: Me? I'm not really a soul mate person. You click or you don't. Pretty simple. 

HER: I guess...

(Long pause)

HIM: I still wonder if in my last relationship I did it wrong. But, her later actions made me realize I was correct to be cautious.

HER: You probably weren't perfect, but you were not to blame for what happened. You loved her and you didn't cheat on her. You did the best you could with the knowledge and experience you had at the time. And, you loved her. All of that is admirable.

HIM: No, I didn't. And yes, I did. I didn't tell her, mostly because she was separated and still married ...I was scared of that. Guess I had every right to be.

HER: Wow... I had no idea, but I get it.

Well, my foot tastes like shit.

(Pause)
I still hate that she hurt you, but I still see so much love in you, and for that I'm grateful as your friend...that she didn't completely destroy you.

HIM: No, I never got into details. She also couldn't take my honesty.

HER: Most people can't take honesty.

HIM: When I tried to talk to her as my girlfriend and confidante, she didn't like it. I've told you about that. She later brought it up by telling me I was a "sad person.” But, she was right. I was sad. Totally unfulfilled in my life.

HER: Yeah, how she made you feel bad for being vulnerable.

HIM: Exactly.

HER: I never forgot it because it broke my heart.

HIM: She, of all people, I thought I could trust.

HER: Because to me that is the definition of love. Being able to be vulnerable in front of someone. I get a sense she needed you to be "the strong silent type."

HIM: Perhaps. I dunno... who knows?

HER: And, if that is what she wants she will never be happy. She's creating herself.

HIM: I hope she's grown up some. For her own sake.

HER: You, however, knew her before she created who she is now. 

HIM: True.

HER: And, that would suck for you.

HIM: Who knows where her head is these days? 

HER: I imagine it makes you question what was ever real about her.

HIM: It makes me question a lot of things. About her and myself.

HER: I get it. It fucks with your sense of knowing.

HIM: Correct.

HER: Which is a very personal thing.

HIM: I don't want to ruin a future relationship because of one bad experience from the past.

HER: You are too smart to do that.

HIM: Well, define smart?

HER: You learn from your mistakes and the mistakes of others. Hell, you LEARN.

HIM: Let me put it this way: What, exactly, was I supposed to learn from that experience? 

(Pause)

There's numerous answers, but I don't know the correct one.

HER: Maybe all those answers are the correct answer.

(Pause)

Hell, you learned how strong you are. You learned who your true friends are.

HIM: I even made new ones, yes. People who I thought were friends abandoned me while new people supported me. 

HER: Exactly. (Pause)

You learned about your own honesty. You learned what was important...
You learned a lot. You learned you are not alone. 

HIM: I get the bigger picture, yes. And that's important. But does one allow themselves to be vulnerable the next time, or to play your cards--smartly--close to the chest?

HER: You just do what you do.

HIM: And that's what scares me.

HER: Never play your cards too close to your chest. And, don't be scared.

HIM: Scared is the wrong term, but you know what I mean.

HER: Yeah, I know what you mean. Don’t be whatever you mean. 

HIM: (He laughs) Right.

HER: You just have to figure out what you want.

HIM: True

HER: I honestly believe that is all you need to do. You are more open to love than you realize. And, you are very loved. You know you don't want another woman like your ex, but beyond that you are unclear on what you want.

HIM: Three times a week by VARIOUS BITCHES! YEAH! (Pause)

Ahem....

HER: (Long pause...she laughs) Yes, and that's great.

HIM: I don't wish my ex on anyone. Even to this day, though... it's still very hard to trash her.

HER: Yes, because you have a huge and loving heart. Besides, you don't need to. You have a harem of bitches who love you that will trash her for you.

(Pause)
Hell, at this point I'm not sure what I'd do if I met your ex.

HIM: Right. It's why I never wanted to meet your ex.

HER: Actually, I think I'd be kind to her and tell her how absolutely amazing you are and how happy you are.

HIM: I'm sure it'll happen one day--I’ll run into her. 

HER: Her inability to be true to herself will fuck her world up more than I ever could. Karma will get her. And, after karma is done with her I’ll eat her for lunch.

(Long pause)

HIM: I know you would...Thanks for listening. 

HER: I would eat her for lunch, you know? 

HIM: I know. 

For those who are really listening and with me. Thank you...